Wednesday, 30 September 2009

God Bless Female Masturbation

What a day, I was just volunteering at my local British Red Cross shop today(because I'm great like that), when a women came in. She was the dodgy looking, jakey, junky type but because it's Dundee, that's pretty common. She took her black jacket off and put it on the floor, then took a white jacket off the shelf, and tried it on. She stepped into the changing room, looked at herself with the jacket on in the mirror and then took it off. She then carried the jacket around the shop as she looked around. I went for a break at this point and then; "Martin, did you serve that woman?". I hadn't. Turns out she stole the jacket. We tried to see if she was along the road. No sign of her. She was gone; or so we thought. We then saw that she was in the British Heart Foundation next door. I told the manager about the women but by then, she'd left the shop. Where was next? Someone else from the red cross shop saw her go into Ann Summers.
It seemed like she'd gotten away. A guy I was working with chose this as the time to cash a cheque he'd gotten earlier so he left the shop - only to return a second later; "Guess who I just saw getting escorted into Ann Summers by a police officer.". That made everyone's day. As it turns out, She'd stolen a couple of vibrators from there last Friday so they had her on CCTV and someone pressed the Panic button.

The white jacket will be returned to the shop and the scummy bitch has been arrested.

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